Friday, February 8, 2013

The Tale of the Shady Lady (Boy) Part1; Welcome to Venice

So after bringing in the New Year in Venice, we waited patiently to hear about our submission to a nice spacious apartment on the main street of Venice, Pacific Ave. After contacting both the realtor and contact person that showed us the place it became a little frustrating as nobody could give us and answer as to whether we got the place or not. After some email correspondence, it was clear nothing would transpire until all parties were finished holidays including extended holidays, fare play. After a week of waiting and chatting with everybody except the owner we get our answer back. Denied, due to the fact that the state of California has no way to track or get ahold of our credit from Canada. Ignorance on my part i guess, i should have done my homework. This now poses a whole different challenge, how do we get our names on a lease if everybody rents with a credit check?. Nonetheless Venice is the hottest spot in America in terms of Real-Estate and its famous street Abbott Kinney was rated in the top 5 hippest streets in America, thus making it home to most of the Hollywood eccentric, artistic and elite. After and exhausting search we come across and add for a short term rental. We call it up and speak to an easy going lady, typical salesperson, feeding us her shit. However were exhausted and go check the place out. Its a shared accommodation , a big loft with a roof top patio, fully furnished, picture a hotel that is a dorm room ala collage.
We mull it over and due to our search we decide to give it a shot, she was offering us a room with two beds on this top floor loft, sounds great right? Done we sign up. This is where the plot thickens, the sales pitch is done and we are committed and good to move in 2 days from now. Things are looking good, until it comes time to move. Are expected time to get in was 2pm , however when we call to make arrangements the lady who i should say her name is Shauntelle starts getting rude with us saying we cant go in until 8pm, why you ask? Oh the building is being fumigated , a yearly thing we are told. Flags go up, in anycase Adam is playing a show and we have a car loaded with our belongings as-well as our valuables that we cant keep in the car. We come to a compromise with Shauntelle and she is getting the building maintenance guy to meet us at 5 ( he legal time anyone is aloud back in the building after a fumigation) to check in and drop our valuables and proceed with the rest of our evening. #shady; However we have no other options at this point. So we show up on time and meet a gentleman names Tim, he takes us to the loft and shows us our room, (picture this Shauntelle has us booked in a 10x15 room , with a private bathroom and 1 bed, not 2 as booked. We over hear Tim talking to Shauntelle and him explaining this to her, frustration in his voice as she obviously is trying to get him to jam another bed in this room, that would work if we were the midget from my previous blog post. However we are not midgets and this isnt going to fly, i tell Tim its not happening and we should be in the vacent room at the back with 2 beds in it, he agrees. Then the phone rings, he gets into a passive aggressive argument with her and i request the phone. She trys to tell me that that was the room we are booked in and it has 2 beds, im shocked as she is obviously putting the hustle on. I explain to her the room we booked had 2 beds and that there is no way to get two beds in this room , as-well there is a vacent room with 2 beds and that she must be mistaken, "Can i speak to Tim," she says. Back to Tim it goes, now he is obviously frustrated as she trys to convince him to put another bed in that room and he is holding his ground with a little support from me reiterating "fuck that". After some back and forth banter we get hit with an extra 25 to be moved into the appropriate room .
Wow, welcome to Venice, we are finally here and getting settled, all in all im a little stunned at this Shauntelle lady who has booked us. Well Im over it, off to Whole foods and back into my "All i do is Pound" fitness regiment well i wait for my guitar pedals to be mailed and design my website www.brentbuffan.com and start prepping to shoot my first music video. We take in Venice pretty seamlessly, finding our local spots , happy hours etc. We land at this what appears to be a local dive bar, however thats a mirage. You walk in and there is sawdust on the floor, brilliant ! no spills and if so , easy clean up. but thats far from why im in love with this place, it has pool tabals, no big deal, look into the corner and it has a free popcorn machine, in the air , well some of the greatest oldschool hiphop and 80s tunes out there. Then on the wall i notice, The silhouette Of the great Black Bird glaring at me with the god like yellow background; It's the sign of IMPERIAL, the Costa Rican Budweiser i have searched high and low for 2 years to find with no luck, but here it is in all its glory and served at this tiny dive bar in Venice, there is obviously more to this place then first glance. On the wall sits a shrine dedicated to Dos-Esquis xx "Most Interesting Man" a poster on the wall where a candle burns below him in respect. I inquire; turns out im standing in his local bar, i must meet him, challenge him. So there it is i have my favourite hang out in Venice right there, frosted mugs with my favorite beer and oldchool hiphop, free popcorn and some dodgy pool tables. Hendos Cafe, i salute .
Back to our dwelling 123 Anchorage street. Life starts to settle, our roomates are this oldschool cat named Brian from Philly, hes chilled, likes smoking La la and by day is a part time building inspector and part time actor. Our other roomate, an X Football player named Less. More to come with Less, great guy and good friend. Life was getting good, i started running the beach daily, working out at muscle beach and getting focused on my music. It was soon joined by some Canadian friends here for a 2 week visit, that set off a little bender, and well all this going on we are now informed by Shauntelle that we can only do weekly contracts for our accomidations. She starts to become very rude in her communications and it comes across like she is bi-Polar. Since we arrived Tim is now, gone , we find out later he quite because of Shauntelle, there is now a new maintenance guy who appears and the mirage of 123 Anchorage starts to unfold. We find out Cockroaches had infested the building and thats why it was fumigated, these things are crazy, not big here in Venice but they slowly start to re-appaear in our loft. Adam names the places La Hotel Coocharocha . Apart from the obvious the circumstances become un-easy as we find ourself worrying about renewing our contract every week, crazy right?. Shauntelle becomes increasing hard to deal with and we start receiving calls from a Shaun who works out of there office. We then find out from other residence, that that is there hustle, Shauntelle rents these rooms out in slow season and they keep it on weekly contracts so that when they get a big fish to come in and rent the whole place out for big wood, then they just keck everyone out. Fuck me. We start gettiing into our escape plan and taking on Less our Roomate as an allis as he is thinking and feeling the same way in this every increasing weird living situation, all and all well entertaining our Canadian guests and trying to further our music careers.
The days of stability are short lived as we are told our floor has been rented out and we are to vacate by the 28th, here we go again. Amongst the looking for a new place to live, stomping around town with our friends, attending shows, open mics, designing websites, setting up video shoots , working out on the beach we find ourself with a late night, followed abruptly by and early morning knock on our bedroom . Its Less, he's holding his hand , blood dripping everywhere. I jump up, what the fuck? "Ive been bit, i just called the cops" . he said. "What the fuck?, i mean what the fuck? i repeated, what time is it? and what the fuck?. "There is some random women on the coach ,"Less says,"I went to tap her shoulder because the remote was next to her and i didnt want to startle her , and she turned and bit me, then jumped up and tried to spray mace at me".
Its now 7am and the house has unraveled at the seams, i forgot to mention upon Shauntelle telling us we have to relocate by the 28th she had also kicked the floor below us out early. Instead of them leaving she told them they could stay in the vacant loft above us that she tried to jam me and Adam into. However the floor below us had 3 people living there, one was this lady Kim, she is a typical Los Angeles "Publicist" Im one the red carpet with blah,blah,blah, ill make you famous, blah.....Im a big wheel and yes i rent the apartment below. So moving forward our floor is now in a full blown 4 alarm mess. Me & Adam, Less, Brian (The cat from Philly who just smokes it all away and chills, and now these 3 people from down stairs, who to this day i think the 2 guys were Kim's sons , but they said they were British artists, that did it all ,rapped,made films, performed. However i never witnessed them leave the couch  so i wouldn't doubt they were her kids as everything screamed BULLSHIT. So here we are , 7 of us and afew randoms, all on one floor, cops on there way, one girl biting another scream rape, a stoned guy from Philly , no place to put our food in the fridge and its 7am.
Lets bounce, its the 21st and im not waiting this out another 8 days, we need a place and fast. The dream is over at 123 Anchorage, im ready to leave La Hotel Coocaroacho way behind me. So we are on the hunt again, this time with a new roomate in tow (Less and his busted hand)................

Turn the fan on, shits about to hit it.   (To Be continued)

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